Yesterday, I turned 23 years old yayyy— I think. There are a few things to keep in mind when turning 23. Yes I know, it’s not 30 or 40 or 50 but it’s still pretty groundbreaking. I mean like, holy cow, I’ve been gracing the earth with my lovely presence for the past 23 years. And why didn’t anyone warm me that 23 would hit me like a wrecking ball.
To my 22 year old friends or readers or passerby LISTEN UP!! I’m going to share with you the God awful truth about turning 23 dunn dunn dunn and it’s free 😉
1. When the clock strikes midnight, you’ll have an impending urge to cry because life as you know it will never be the same.
2. After you wipe your once 22 year old tears, you will cheer that it’s your Birthday then cue the crocodile tears—once more.
3. You’ll still be unsure of who you are.
4. Keep calm, you’ll make it.
5. The desire to travel went from 0 to 100 real quick but you are broke. Help me, I’m poor 😦
6. Alcohol is not as fun as it used to be or is it, hehe.
7. You’ll begin to wonder if anyone will invent an actual spell to rewind time.
8. At some point you’ll start to save. . . like really start to save.
9. Because all of a sudden, you’re expected to have your life together but you’ve made like 119,508,048 mistakes and you still don’t have any experience in Excel.
10. After a while, you’ll begin to order your coffee black. No milk, no cream, no sugar, no anything— just black.
11. Everyone you meet will magically be wearing a wedding band.
12. You’ll begin to wonder why you are single. . .
13. For ladies, you’ll suddenly start to realize the importance of moisturizing and using sunscreen.
14. Nobody likes you if you are 23— just putting that out there.
15. You’ll realize that becoming a Cat Lady isn’t soooo bad.
16. There is a possibility that you’ll have gained 0.9% confidence.
18. Eventually, everyone and everything will suddenly become unbearable. Where is the mute button?
19. You’ll falsely think that you know everything. But the truth is, you know nothing at all and you’ll begin to ask if Google is making you stupid.
20. You’ll realize that being in your twenties is absurdly terrifying. I mean like why am I not a millionaire yet?
21. Wait, I used to be 21 😦
22. Wait, I used to be 22 😦
23. Because next year you’ll be 24 and there is a whole other list waiting for you. Yayy the perks.